One of the worst situations a person can face is to have their heart broken. People suffer too much after a breakup, especially if the relationship has been long-lasting. heartbreak It is one of the worst feelings you can feel.
Heartbreak is one of the most recurrent topics in any psychological consultation. It is a feeling similar to mourning due to the death of a loved one. The feeling of loss It is similar and produces great emotional pain.
What is heartbreak?
Heartbreak is a psychological state which forces those who feel it to recalculate their expectations and emotions after having cut off the relationship with a person with whom we had planned a project, illusions and certain plans in the short, medium or long term future.
Suddenly, a relationship of years disappears in a couple of weeks or even a couple of days. The most common feelings that people develop in this context are: sadness and the frustration. This is a consequence of the various expectations that we had imagined when faced with that person.
There are two main types of heartbreak:
- Heartbreak due to breakup: It means the end of a relationship or marriage. The main characteristic that marks this type of heartbreak is that we have to adapt to a new way of life, with different habits.
- Heartbreak for unrequited love: the relationship has not even come to fruition or it has not happened in a bilateral way. The characteristic of this type of heartbreak is the appearance of the feeling of having wasted time trying to make that person fall in love with us. A feeling of feeding a mirage.
Although it is possible to overcome heartbreak without help, sometimes the process becomes complicated. If you feel that the pain is not letting you move forward and you notice that you are not making progress in the recovery process, you can put yourself in the hands of an online psychologist.
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What are the stages of heartbreak?
To begin the process of recovering from a breakup, the first thing we must be clear about are the different phases of heartbreak:
- Denial and isolation phase
The person denies that the separation is taking place. You ignore the fact and continue acting as if the person were your partner. It is a form of self-protection so as not to be exposed to the harsh reality of having to leave the relationship with an important person at a certain period in your life.
The person who is at this stage must stop and reflect on your emotionsIt wouldn't hurt to ask for help or advice from those around you who have lived with your partner so that they can offer you the most objective point of view possible.
The person is angry with the world. Realizing the separation, he or she blames the other person for all the couple's problems. He avoids responsibilities and prefers to make excuses when everything was against him.
Sometimes anger is not only directed towards the other member of the couple, but there may also be a wear and tear on relationships with people around you.
Be careful with this stage. If the person does not manage it correctly, the person will look for any loophole to return to have a relationship with that partner. Depending on how you want to get closer to that person, it can make the situation worse.
The impossibility is accepted to return to the side of the one who was his partner. He begins a path separate from that person, realizing that the future they had planned will not come true. He feels a deep sorrow that you have to know how to handle in order not to fall into depression.
The person begins to see a new futurewhere he will meet new people and experiences. He becomes excited again about the idea of being able to meet a person who will be part of his life or perhaps he has learned to live with his loneliness in the field of love.
How do I get over it?
As we have mentioned before, this psychological phenomenon is usually relieved by time and the support of your friends or family. However, there is a series of recommendations or tips to overcome and continue with your chores:
- Make a calendar with upcoming activities
Prepare a planning with short and medium term activities, it will help you brain to focus on activities that you have in the future, ignoring the emotional ordeal that you are going through.
- Learn to live with that slight discomfort
The only thing you will achieve by blocking thoughts is that will appear in your headYou have to assume that the negative memories that caused the breakup are going to occupy a place in your brain, but you have to be able to direct thoughts towards matters that give you a pleasant feeling.
- Don't put the responsibility on the other person
The common thing after a breakup is Trying to build a story in which the other person is the devil himself.Changing memories to fit your narrative will only cause you to think about the breakup more, which will make you feel bad.
You should not neglect everything related to the physical. If you can create new healthy lifestyle habitslike exercising, is the ideal way to de-stress and escape from problems. If your body is well, you It will be easier to control emotions.
Breakups are always a complicated matter to bear, but you should always have support to heal the wound that this relationship has caused you. Whether it is the support of a family member or a friend.
At we have been helping patients from all over the world find their well-being since 2012. We were pioneers in offering online therapy and that is why we know that it is an economical, but equally effective, alternative to traditional therapies.
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