Fear, indecision… How many times have they paralyzed us? The easiest thing to do is to stay in our comfort zone and be prepared for whatever comes next.
If this is so, think that you are practicing the self-sabotageAre you looking for a life change? A new job? Do you want to quit smoking? You won't achieve your goals if you start putting limitations on yourself.
What is self-sabotage?
Are acts either behaviors that appear unconsciously at key moments for people. In this way, the proposed objectives or goals are not achieved. It is a behavior that makes the person hide in his comfort zonewhere everything is simple or even predictable. As if it were a defense mechanism, it is used automatically to avoid suffering, to avoid stress, etc.
A clear example is going on a date, where fear takes over you and, even if you really like the other person, you end up cancelling. And this happens in thousands of situations. The fear of future changes makes you a victim of self-sabotage.
Causes of self-sabotage
These behaviors that prevent you from facing a certain situation usually appear when they involve a high level of responsibilitysuch as making a decision that can change an aspect of your life. Once you recognize the causes of self-sabotage, you will be able to overcome it sooner:
- Low self-esteemThe main problem is your self-concept, that is, the concept you have of yourself and that is sometimes difficult to change.
- Lack of self-esteem causes insecuritylack of confidence. You don't believe you are capable of achieving the goals you have set for yourself.
- Another option is that you feel lost because You don't know exactly what you want to getr. The absence of objectives causes you to easily fall into self-sabotage.
- Lack of motivationIf you are not excited about a new project, for example, it is normal that you will stagnate and your goals will be hindered.
- Fear of failure. You are afraid of making mistakes and making errors, which is why it is difficult for you to make decisions.
- Fear of changeswhether at work or in your relationship… You think you can't face them and you stay in your comfort zone.
- Pressure to try to meet the expectations and goals of others. Have you ever wondered whether your goals are yours or someone else's? This often happens with studies (the career your parents want and not you), with work (because your partner wants you to do a certain project), etc.
If you present yourself as someone who is defeated, people will treat you as someone who is losing. If you start to stand up straight, people will look at you and treat you differently.
Jordan B. Peterson
Self-sabotage arises because of the aspects you do not accept about yourself and the beliefs fearful. These factors live in your mind and affect your behavior. They interfere with your projects and their evolution. The difference between a person who self-sabotages and one who does not is that the latter can leave their fears behind and get rid of the beliefs and thoughts that cause insecurity.
Types of self-sabotage
There are four ways to classify self-sabotage:
- Leaving things half doneThere are people who start several projects that they then do not finish. Leaving halfway or abandoning is easier than facing failure. However, the problem is that these people will never realize their potential and will see themselves as incompetent, mediocre.
- Procrastinationthat is, postponing or delaying things. Many people put off their pending activities as much as possible. It is very common and we see it every day: “I will sign up for the gym next month”, “After this winter I have to call the academy”, “I will start the diet next week”… Normally, this case occurs when we do not like certain tasks and we do not feel like doing them.
- Excuses. Whatever it may be, as long as you can face change (age, time, economy…).
- Perfectionism. It is the perfect reason for not moving forward. A person may believe that he or she will not reach perfection in an activity and that is why he or she does not do it or during the performance of the activity he or she does not satisfy that perfectionism and abandons it.
Are you self-sabotaging?⚔️
There are many who cannot help but be put down by a lack of self-confidence, low self-esteem or fear of change or failure 💔
@chulisimomx #mentalhealth #self-sahabitation #self-love #self-esteem #security pic.twitter.com/dI3l8f2GKn
— siquia | psychologists (@siquiacom) November 14, 2021
Treatment to stop sabotaging yourself
These are some keys Useful:
- Accept your fears
- Take care of the motivation
- Work on your self-esteem: at we offer a free first session so you can learn how our team of online psychologists can help you.
- Be patient and don't throw in the towel
- Achieve physical and mental stability
Try a free session
Improve your self-esteem, resolve your insecurities and conflicts with the professional help of a psychologist.
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With the help of a psychological therapy You will be able to delve into the aspects that concern you most about yourself, you will learn to love and accept yourself and overcome your fears.
Remember that it will not be easy, but you will see how by eliminating those negative beliefs and fears you will gradually achieve your goals. goals (sensible and achievable) until you completely eliminate your self-sabotage.
Why choose
- We have been leaders in online psychological care since 2012.
- First informational appointment free.
- Online therapy from 40 euros per session.
- Team of senior psychologists, with decades of experience.
- All the therapy we offer is via videoconference. 100% confidential.
- The same psychologist will attend to you throughout the treatment.
- At you do not lose the money for the sessions. If you cannot connect or are not there, the session is postponed to another day.
- Attention in Spanish, English and Catalan.