One of the most damaging emotions a human being can feel is envy. This, despite being a universal emotionit is not natural and much less healthy for those who feel it. We are talking about that discomfort and resentment which envy generates. It is much more effective and efficient to try to be bold, unique and brave. Never under any circumstances should you let the success that the people around you may have that stops you from achieving your goals.
Today we are going to give you some tips so that you can focus on your achievements and strengths and not on those of other people; in short, to stop being envious.
Why am I envious?
The envy It is an emotion that occurs for different reasons, but one of the main ones is believing that for some reason a situation is occurring. injustice. You ask yourself: “Why does he or she have to be richer, smarter, harder-working, famous, charming or more loved by others?”These, among others, are the questions that people usually ask themselves. envious. Why do others have or are better than them, instead of learning to enjoy and accept their life as it is or making the decision to work hard to improve it… Is it easier to criticize than to make an effort to change?
What kind of envious person are you?
There are two types of envious people:
- People “healthily envious«. Even though They want what others have or the kind of life they lead, at no time they wish them no harm.
- And there are the “insanely envious”. Not only They long to have what someone or others havebut they also deeply wish for them to lose it. In fact, they feel very happy when things go badly for the person they envy, when they make a mistake, lose their partner or their partner betrays them.
Within this second group are also included many people who They don't consider themselves badbut they would like not to feel this feeling, although at the same time They can't avoid it or control it.. And they can't stop it because they feel it in a certain way impulsive and uncontrollable. This is how when they are in the presence of the “object of their envy” automatically triggers the desire for it to fail and fail. They look for a way to make them look bad in front of others or discredit them, justifying their success in anything but their merits and they do easy and unfair value judgments.
You are envious if…
- Whether it's because of the things or possessions another person has and/or because of their personality, they constantly you compare yourself to them.
- Don't sit down content with yourself.
- You don't manage to live your life, but rather you live the lives of others, You spend a lot of time thinking about what you want to have as well as what you don't have.
- You feel upset or angry when faced with happiness or success of others; in fact, you are always hoping that things will go badly for other people so that you will feel less unhappy.
- You never recognize that you have a problem envy.
- You tend to be a person very foul-mouthed, pessimistic, mocking and critical.
Envy is a telltale sign of our own unfulfilled aspirations. Accepting it with introspection can turn it into a powerful catalyst for self-discovery and personal development.
What you can do to feel better about yourself
- Have a lot of faith in yourself. Learn to have confidence in yourselfsince you have the ability to solve your problems and you can do make all your dreams come true If that's what you want. Keep in mind that when a person has confidence in themselves, they love and respect themselves.
- Don't get involved in anyone's life, nor judge it.. Learn not to get involved in other people's lives, because as long as you continue blaming others of your “misfortunes”, you will not be able to see the solutions. Complaints do not They bring no solutionbecause you are constantly looking and talking about others instead of looking at yourself.
- Don't talk bad about your «competition». Stop being paying attention to what others are doing, Rather, discover your uniqueness, what makes you unique, what is yours and what is characteristic.
- Design and enjoy your own life. You need all your energy to plan all the details that will help you achieve your dreamsthat is, day, time and exact ways of how to do it. Visualize exactly how you will achieve your dreams. So don't waste time worrying about other people's lives and focus on yours.
- Unleash your originality and exploit itYou don't have to be different from everyone else, you just have to be unique, you have to be yourself.
- Expand your resources. Keep in mind that life will put you in different situations so that you will act in new ways.
Keys to overcome envy
Managing envy is not only possible but also constructive. To cultivate a healthier and more positive mindset in your life:
Disengage from envy
Recognize that you experience envy without defining yourself by it. Emotions are neither right nor wrong; they just are. Don't punish yourself for feeling envy; this recognition is the first step in managing any emotion.
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Observe when it arises
Identify patterns of envy. Does it arise in certain environments or specific times? With awareness of these patterns, take proactive steps. If envy arises with certain people, arm yourself with positive affirmations or ask questions about their success to better understand it.
Make a list of your envy triggers:
Clarify what specific aspects are driving envy. Is it a friend's professional success on social media? By understanding this, you can focus your energy positively, working toward realistic goals for yourself.
Question your envy
Before accepting it as valid, think about whether you really want what you apparently don't have and whether it's worth it. Would you like someone else's career if you found out they hadn't taken a break in months? Don't compare yourself without having all the information.
Be realistic in your comparisons
Avoid comparing yourself to unattainable goals. While certain achievements may not be attainable, don't torture yourself. Remove yourself from situations that make you aware of what you lack.
Visualize envy as a message
Consider envy as a sign of what you want in your life. Use it as a wish list, channeling that energy into attainable goals. Turn envy into positive motivation.
Practice gratitude
Make time for gratitude. When you feel envious, remind yourself of the good things in your life. Shift your focus to the positive, countering the feeling of lack.
Evaluate your values briefly
Identify what really motivates you. Do you want money for its own sake or for the freedom and support of others? Find alternative ways to achieve those values.
Share with someone you trust
Envy is often bottled up out of shame. Sharing your feelings with someone you trust can ease the burden. Talking to a close friend can help, as most people have experienced envy at some point.
Gaining self-confidence is not something that happens overnight. Consult a psychologist to achieve the goals you set for yourself and develop a healthier relationship with everyone around you.
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