I am jealous of my partner's success, what can I do? – Online Psychologists

We all know envy and have experienced it to a greater or lesser extent at some point in our lives, but the truth is that envy is never healthyIt is a negative feeling that generates sadness, frustration and sometimes becomes the protagonist of many relationships.

When this happens, you have to be careful with confusing envy with ambitionWanting to improve and advance professionally is very different from experiencing toxic feelings regarding your partner's success.

Don't see your partner as a threat, put things into perspective and put them into context. Not all people move in the same direction or at the same speed, maybe this isn't your moment, so don't compare yourself to them.

Don't get stuck in absurd comparisons and Don't fall into a toxic spiral which will only bring you dissatisfaction and frustration.

Envy is an emotion that generates pain, frustration and even anger. It is the product of a series of comparisons and is related to the concept we have of ourselves. When our self-esteem is low and our expectations are not met, we begin to compare ourselves.

The object of envy can be very varied, but there are many people who experience it. envy in relation to the success of others and especially that of your partner.

The truth is that there are a number of deficiencies and insecurities that lead to this systematic envy. This sometimes causes us to perceive our partner's achievements as a threat, when we should see them as an inspiration.

However, We live in a highly competitive world and there are many people who interpret their partner's success as a personal failure, thus diminishing their self-esteem and it is a very frequent reason for seeking psychological therapy.

Jealousy and envy They seem like similar concepts and even synonyms, but they are not the sameTheir characteristics, causes and consequences are very different.

These are the main differences between jealousy and envy:

One of the main differences is that while envy focuses on something that is desiredthat is, a job you have wanted for a long time or a promotion. jealousy They focus on the fear of losing something that is already there.

Envy is often based on a certainty, since the other person (your partner, in this case) has something that you don't. This can apply to professional success: there is the certainty that our partner has gotten, for example, a promotion and it makes us feel envious.

However, In the case of jealousy, it is uncertainty. what causes them. We are not sure that our partner has found a job, but we are afraid that he or she will take ours away, for example.

They are two very different emotions.

Another difference we found is that Jealousy is often motivated by the fear of losing that which we have achieved and that which we already have.

While, Envy is often accompanied by resentmentanger and frustration that our partner has achieved what we want.

It is not always easy to recognize envy in a relationship, but there are traits and ways of acting that reveal this discomfort caused by your partner's success.

When a person feels envious of their partner's achievements, it is common for them to try to hinder their plans or progress. This is a toxic behaviorbut which many people exercise almost without being aware of it.

The truth is that envy within a couple can become one of the great enemiesbecause you become their biggest critic, when you should be their greatest support.

Feeling envious will make you object to everything your partner does or achieves.

If you are envious of your partner's success, you may not recognize his or her achievements and may even minimize their value.

In addition to not being happy about your partner's success, you will find it difficult to congratulate him or her on what he or she has achieved. In fact, you may question how he or she achieved it and minimize his or her abilities.

This is one of the most toxic and destructive behaviors. By not being able to bear your success, you enjoy every mistake you make and feel superior.

The first thing you should do to overcome and confront envy is recognize what you feelIt is not easy to realize that you are experiencing a feeling as negative as envy, but it is essential to recognize it in order to analyze the damage it causes to you, to your self-esteem, and thus be able to overcome it.

It is very important that foster self-confidence and the concept you have of yourself and your capabilities.

Likewise, you must learn to relativize and eliminate the negative feelings that accompany envyYou should be happy about your partner's achievements and not see them as a threat to you and your success.

It is essential that Avoid comparisons and focus on yourself and your own abilities. Your partner is not your rivalbe happy with their success, life is not a competition.

Although it may sound cliché, it is a reality that Your partner's success is also yours.

It is essential that you are clear that Each person has their own time and their capabilities, not everyone moves in the same direction, focus on yourself and compete with yourself.

At we have been experts in online therapy since 2012. Throughout our career we have helped more than 2,000 patients overcome various emotional problems. If you are interested in seeking the help of an online psychologist, you can request a free first session by clicking on the button below.