You realize that you are in a stormy relationship when they argue between shouts and insults, when in the middle of the moment the words are more offensive and together they lose control, where is the love and respect?
You can swear and perjure that he loves you and would never hurt you, your memories of better times support you. However, it’s not just about them fighting all the time, it’s about that empty space that you can no longer fill inside yourself, about the suspicions that cast a shadow over your days, the hurtful comments that you swear you don’t notice or don’t act on. bad faith, constant regret because you genuinely believe that «it’s you» that is wrong and so many more ways that your mind finds to torture you.
You’ve tried everything: gifts, more attention, more sexual attachment and yet everything seems to go in reverse. Your friends have moved away from you, your relationship doesn’t make them happy, so every day you feel more alone and you can’t help but make the same mistakes over and over again…
SOUNDS YOU A LITTLE?
I really hope not. All of us who have suffered from being in a toxic relationship recognize certain feelings when we read similar stories. Unfortunately in these cases, codependency does not allow us to advance enough to take the final step of leaving them. Identifying a toxic relationship is easier from the outside, but once we are inside, it is almost impossible not to go into denial. It’s not that the whole world hasn’t told you before, the problem is that when you realize you’re in one, you usually don’t know how to get out…
The big question is: Should I get out? You flip the pros and cons but end up back in the same condition when your partner does something nice for you.
BUT HOW DO WE GET RID OF THIS KIND OF RELATIONSHIP?
It is not easy and you have to have a lot of willpower. You will probably need several attempts until you get the final one. Do not be in doubt! If you’re in one of these relationships, YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF THERE NOW!
Also read: Relationships you should turn your back on
YOUR SELF-ESTEEM IS IMPORTANT
As long as you fail to love yourself, no one will be able to love you fully. Self love is what in your eyes gives you value and makes you who you are. There are people who spend years locked up in denial because it hurts to know that we don’t know each other and we buy ideas like we really can never change the way we already are. A self-destructive behavior is always going to be harmful, what you should always look for is to break the pattern. Stop having so much compassion for yourself, dare to take the step. If you need help, see a psychologist. It’s never too late to start over!
Keep in mind that this instability attracts unstable people, low self-esteem is a magnet for toxic partners.
YOU CAN’T FALL IN A DEEPER HOLE
Once you have accepted that you are in a destructive relationship, you need to seek inner support. Even if your mom demands that you end the relationship, we know you’re not going to do it. Your true executioner must be yourself, turn your back on your desire to receive affection. You are worth more than being with a man who doesn’t love you and hurts you, whatever it is. Women are stronger than we seem. Don’t let yourself fall apart once you decide to quit. Do not think twice, your unconscious has already repeated it to you many times.
START CLIMBING IN SOLITUDE
When the storm has passed, you have thrown his things and you have gotten rid of his contact and so many other things that can help you start again, it is counterproductive for you to start looking for another relationship or go looking for affection. Take care of yourself before you start living the crazy life, you can end up in the same place where you started.
Loneliness is not bad, on the contrary! Did you know that the most successful women in this world prefer it? It’s not so much because they love to be busy or don’t have time for a relationship, they just found the best person in life to spend the rest of their lives with: themselves. Self love has no comparison, it can make you climb as high as you want. It is obvious that you are going to feel anxiety and frustration at first, but time heals any wound, it is time to heal and begin a time of internal rediscovery that will help you recover and initiate the internal change that will give you the self-love that you so much need.
LEARN AND LET SHADES OF GRAY COME BACK TO COLOR
Learn from the mistakes of your past and don’t fall back on them. Fight loneliness by seeking help and support from your family and friends, little by little you will regain confidence and you will be a completely different person than the one who was in that emotional tornado. Do you know when it’s time to go to a psychologist? When you have a problem and need help to solve it, you don’t always have to be sick, much less crazy.
So there is nothing wrong with it, a good psychologist merely helps you find the tools to solve the problem within you. May what you left yesterday make you a stronger woman today, one that no one can trample on, one who loves and respects herself for who she is, because we all have inside a beautiful person who deserves true love.
Taken from I love shoes