If you don’t want to keep the things you have to say to your partner, but you don’t want to fight either, what do you do?
We all know that there are very complicated issues to address with the couple, such as uncomfortable situations with the mother-in-law or her family in general, money problems, division of household chores, etc. At some point in the relationship, many of us we keep our opinions to ourselves simply to avoid a fight.
But what is better? Shut up or speak up and face a fight? According to psychologist André Didyme-Dome, the key is to learn to communicate, because it is better to say things, as long as they make sense and are relevant; I mean, if it bothers you how they’re spending the money, say so, but if you think your ex was a better fuck, why do you say it?
We consult with this specialist about how not to keep to ourselves the things we have to say without the need for Troy to be armed for it in our house, and gave us some very interesting advice:
- Learn to be inclusive, that is, do not talk about «you» or «I», but about «us»
- Never use “no”: Instead of saying “noor I like it”, “you can’t”, say “we can do this” or “this can be better like this”
- No “tonitos”, sometimes the “how” stands out more than the “what”
- Never speak as if the other person has a cognitive disability
- Avoid phrases like «you’ll see» or «it’s your decision»
- Very important! Don’t talk about private things in public
- Never ever make fun of your partner in front of others
- And although it goes without saying, do not say things in order to mistreat or hurt
Sometimes it’s better to act than sayconcludes the expert.
What have you had to keep to yourself to avoid a fight? Share this note on your networks and tell us about your case in the comments.