I don't have the strength to keep going. 8 tips to regain motivation – Online Psychologists

Who would have told us a year ago that our lives would suddenly and unexpectedly change forever? But not yours or mine, but that of the entire planet. Possibly, if someone had said that, we would have called them a fraud or even called them crazy. As if madness were so easy to see…

What we do see on a daily basis, already sitting on the crest of what will be the third wave of the pandemic – that of mental disorders – are many patients, most of them plagued by economic, work or family problems of all kinds, who repeat to us “I no longer have the strength to continue”. People who have lost motivation and, above all, the illusion that is the greatest driving force of life. Do we see it?

What is motivation?

Motivation is the action and effect of motivating, that is, the reason that leads us to perform or not perform an action.

It comes from the Latin word motivus (movement) and the suffix -tion (action or effect) and refers to that which guides, maintains and determines behavior from a psychological point of view.

Are there different types of motivation?

Indeed, we can talk about different types:

  • Of achievementThe mechanism that produces the action is to achieve an objective, whether general or specific.
  • By affiliation. When seeking security and belonging to a group.
  • Of competition. The goal is sought to be achieved as best as possible.

Motivation is fundamental since, thanks to it, we create habits, we try, we make efforts to carry out productive or rewarding activities and we satisfy our needs.

For this reason, we can also distinguish between two other types:

  • Positive motivation. It leads us to perform actions to obtain a benefit.
  • Negative motivation. It leads us to take actions to avoid the possible negative consequences thereof.

However, in Psychology and depending on the source from which it comes, we can differentiate two types of motivation:

  • Intrinsic motivation. We carry out actions for internal incentives such as personal satisfaction, learning, self-esteem…
  • Extrinsic motivationAn action is carried out due to a stimulus that comes from an external source such as salary, recognition, applause, positive reinforcement…

Which of the last two do you think is the most important? If you answered intrinsically, you are right, you are a person with good motivation. If you answered extrinsically, we will explain how to find strength where there seems to be none.

How to find the strength to keep going? 8 keys to regain motivation

When we need strength to move forward, paradoxically, we must take psychological distancewhich we are not very used to in this time of social distancing.

“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it”

Einstein

By taking distance, we can evaluate the problem from another point of view – with perspective, with objectivity, as if the situation were happening to a third party – and it helps us reach the solution more easily.

  • Identify what exactly is happening to you

To move forward, understand why you can't do it. Another paradox? No, simplicity. When you try to get something done without knowing exactly what's going on, you're likely to end up lurching in no direction. In the end, you'll end up worse off than you are, and that's not the point, is it? You have to identify exactly and precisely what's happening to you. help from a psychologist It would be very helpful for you to verbalize what is happening to you. It is the only way to understand it and overcome it.

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When the problem is well defined, other problems that are unconsciously present and that are, in reality, what keeps you trapped appear. In this way, you go deeper and solutions appear. For example, it is not the same to say “I am unmotivated” than “I am unmotivated because I see no way out of my problems” or “I am unmotivated because I do not believe I can meet the expectations of others of me.”

It is important to ask yourself “what is my biggest obstacle?” and when you find the solution, ask yourself the question again and so on until you find your real problem.

A good strategy is write an emotional diary because, by writing down our problems, our thoughts and emotions about them, We achieved a psychological distance which allows us to express all our concerns more openly.

At other times, demotivation comes from having forgotten your life goals, the things that make you wake up every morning and do everything you do – or should do – during the day and make the decisions you have made up to now. True! It certainly takes time. hard work, effort and perseverance But everything that really matters requires it. So never lose perspective, your perspective…

At this point, you need to look back – Relax, it’s just a moment, it’s not a contradiction – so you remember “why did you start?” “what goals did you want to achieve?” “do you still want it?”

If your conclusion is that you still have the same desire to achieve the same goals that you set out, you activate the intentionality and you regain your intrinsic motivationwhich gives you the strength to continue moving forward, facing these difficult times.

  • Get rid of what's holding you back

What would you do if you fell into quicksand? Surely, pushed by anguish and fearyou might start kicking and sink deeper. Push to get out but it may not be a good solution either, especially if you are not very strong.

Of course, we could also make few movements and take off our shoes to try to get out of the sand again.

The same goes for life. Most of the time it's a good idea getting rid of our emotional backpacks and everything that we should not carry because it is precisely what prevents us from moving forward. To do this, we must know if what is holding us back is a habit, negative automatic thoughts, cognitive distortions or limiting beliefs.

  • Generate multiple solutions for your problem

You may feel stuck because you don't see any way out of your problems, but in Psychology, we use the so-called problem solving technique which can be very useful to you. Here's how it works.

Problem-solving techniques explained by a psychologist

Sit down and take a piece of paper. Describe your main problem in one sentence. From there, generate multiple solutions to it – not all of them have to be perfect, some may even seem useless – but no matter how many, list as many as possible. From here, generates reflective thinking and choose only three of these options – the ones you think are most realistic and probable – and observe in each case their advantages and disadvantages. Finally, choose the one you consider the best of the three.

This will allow you to see all the possible options and your motivation will increase. In the same way, it is important that you see that There is no perfect and ideal solution –which can lead to analysis paralysis – but there are many possibilities that can work for your current situation, you just have to open your mind.

  • Remind yourself to be motivated

As the daily demands are constant, it becomes difficult to complete everyday tasks and you end up feeling more demotivated. It is precisely at these times that you need to remind yourself to stay motivated and active.

It is difficult for everything in life to go as we had planned. When this happens, we will again have unexpected problems at work or in the family that will seem like a world to us, which is why it is important be able to adapt to the changes that are coming. This requires a open mind, resilience and flexibility to make decisions.

Even if you are pursuing your goals – personal or professional – keep in mind that you must know how to stop, take some time for yourself and rest. This will improve your physical and emotional health, your well-being, and you will start again full of energy and motivation.

At we have been experts in online therapy since 2012. Throughout our career we have helped more than 2,000 patients overcome various emotional problems. If you are interested in seeking the help of an online psychologist, you can request a free first session by clicking on the button below.

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