Getting back with your ex after 20 years, is it possible? – Online Psychologists

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez have captured the attention of paparazzi and tourists on romantic getaways. Why so much excitement? The couple has resumed their relationship after 17 years apart. Is it possible to get back with your ex after 20 years? We will see now.

Getting back with your ex after 20 years

Relationships end and years pass, but is it possible to get back with your ex 20 years after the split? As Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez have shown, Yes, it is possible to resume it despite the passage of so much time..

When you break up with your partner and a lot of time passes, it is very common to have the desire to know What would have happened if I had continued?or if the same thing would happen again now as that time. However, after 20 years, you are two different people who have matured separately and that, when they meet at the right moment, they can come together again and endure over time.

The passage of the Time can be a disadvantage or an advantageit depends on how you look at it. For so many years People grow, change and maturethey can become a totally different person – which in many cases means an advantage. What may not change over so many years is the affection that one feels for the other person. If it has been an intense, beautiful and healthy relationship, it is difficult to forget it.

The factor that generally determines the reunion of couples is the memory they have of the relationship. If it was a toxic and unpleasant relationship is unlikely to be resumedHowever, if it was a healthy relationship that ended because it was considered that it was not the right time, it can continue despite the passage of time. Although this requires effort from each party.

Social media and its role in reunion

A tool that has prompted the return of many couples into our lives They are social networks and the Internet.

When a relationship ends, it is common not to hear from the other person again, as this would imply that one of the two would take the first step. However, social networks They encourage us to get back in touch sooner or later. with those people with whom we had relationships.

The reasons for the breakup

If your ex-partner has contacted you and you have resumed communication with the intention of getting back in touch, the first thing you should do is You must ask yourself what the reasons were. for which the relationship ended.

Obviously, a separation due to an argument is not the same as a breakup due to infidelity. Therefore, you must reflect on whether the cause of the breakup was really serious Or if, on the contrary, there were minor reasons that separated you.

There are many people who would never go back to someone who has been unfaithful to them, and on the other hand, there are others who can overcome the situation without so many difficulties. Before getting back with your ex-partner you have to reflect on whether it is a good option and whether it is best for you.

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Choosing couples therapy after 20 years to try to get back with your ex can provide a safe space to explore personal changes and effective communication, allowing for a stronger and more mature reconciliation.

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Four disadvantages of getting back with your ex

Reviving a relationship from the past has a series of advantages and disadvantages that we will now explain to you, starting with the disadvantages:

1. Things may have changed

The years have passed for both of you and you have both changed during this period. After leaving the relationship, it may happen that The return is no longer the same. As we have pointed out before, the reason for the breakup plays an important role. However, beyond the reasons for the separation, the The other person's personality may have changed and may no longer fit you.

2. It prevents you from continuing

If you've tried to maintain the relationship with that person, but it hasn't worked out, maybe you should let them go. Repeating the same failed decision prevents you from continuing and growing. in life.

Likewise, insisting on going back to a past relationship when it didn't work out may mean that You need new companies and to get out of your comfort zone so as not to return to distant times.

3. The damage can be greater

Getting back with your ex sometimes means reviving and opening old wounds from the past to which new conflicts may arise. The ball can get even bigger and the result will be worse than before. If you suffered when the relationship ended, now the damage may be even greater by including more reasons or more hope placed on it.

4. Grudges are often present

Depending on the issue that broke you up, you may never get over what happened. If the cause was infidelity, not everyone is ready to let it go. If resentment is present during the new relationship opportunity, It is difficult for the ending to be happy.

Four advantages of getting back with your ex

1. You already know each other

One of the advantages and positive aspects of getting back with your ex-partner is that you already know each other and there is a sexual-affective connection between you. If you want to get back with your ex it is because he or she has positive qualities that you want to have back in your life. However, at the time of reconciliation it is important work on the negative aspects that separated you at that time.

2. Learning from mistakes together

Conflicts are common in relationships. However, everything can be solved with dialogue, respect and trust. Getting back together after a long time means adapt to each other again and learn new aspects that have changed over the years. Now is the time to learn from our mistakes together.

3. You may be closer

It may happen that after leaving you you have missed each other and realized how important you are to each otherdespite so many years having passed. Getting back together can mean that you are closer than before.

4. If you have children together it can be good for them

If you had children in the relationship you had years ago, getting back together after many years can be good for them. It is important to know how to approach and deal with this aspect well, as it can be a big change for themeven if they are older. Explain to them what happened, the reasons for your reunion and your plans for the future, since this relationship also concerns them.

If you are considering getting back with your ex after 20 years, keep these recommendations in mind and reflect your own personal situation is superfluous. Set a scale in which the one that has much more weight decision that is best for youIf you need help, you can consult your closest circle of friends or even a professional. At we work on these and many other relationship issues.

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