The most destructive thought is the one that refers to the fact that nobody loves you, nobody appreciates you and nobody values you. The feeling that nobody cares about you It plunges you into a psychological imbalance that locks you into a state of restlessness and loneliness that is difficult to confront.
Feeling loved is often a belief based on:
- Don't feel doubts that they love youfor which affection has to be constant and there cannot be ups and downs in personal relationships.
- Let them remind you of what you mean to them to feel safe.
There are several Factors that contribute to you feeling unloved.
Depressive disorder
There is a possibility that you are suffering from a depressive picture when you keep telling yourself that no one cares about you. The most common symptoms linked to depression are:
- Mood swingsbut all of them negatives: anger, frustration, sadness, hopelessness, loneliness, guilt.
- DemotivationYou no longer enjoy what you liked or were interested in so much.
- Physical exhaustion.
- Isolation. This untreated and unmanaged pain makes it difficult for you to establish strong emotional ties.
- Sleep disturbance (insomnia or hypersomnia).
Maybe you drag some psychological traumawhich increases that feeling of loneliness. For example, post-traumatic stress disorder. It also occurs if you have experienced a situation of stress or neglect or if you have suffered abuse.
Self-esteem, self-concept and security
The thought of “nobody cares about me” also stems from a low self-esteemof a negative self-concept. Since you do not appreciate or value yourself, you think that no one will do it and rightly so, because «you do not deserve it.» Therefore, a continuous devaluation of your person It can lead to you feeling like you shouldn't be liked by others.
Loneliness is the echo of one's absence.
Octavio Paz
Low self-esteem is the trigger for many negative beliefs about yourself, always accompanied by the insecurity. You must work on reinforce your self-esteemIt is not easy, since knowing yourself takes a long time.
To get started, you can follow these steps:
- Respecting others is as important as respecting yourself. Don't let your negative thoughts and self-destructive criticism hurt you, and don't let others hurt you either.
- Err It is human. Stop seeing mistakes as an excuse to judge yourself. Something good can always come out of bad things. Give yourself every opportunity to make mistakes.
- Establishes realistic short-term goalsthat is, those that are achievable and that motivate you. Unrealistic and long-term goals have the opposite effect: demotivation and reluctance, since you do not see improvement or progress.
- Don't be afraid of express your opinions or your tastes out loud.
- Learn that you don't need the approval of othersYou can't obsess over what they think. Be yourself and live your life the way you want.
Keep in mind that if you let your welfare You will never be able to control your emotional state if you depend on third parties. That is why it is essential that this approval comes from you towards yourself.
How to deal with your insecurity and feeling like you don't matter to anyone
- ReflectWhy do I feel this way? What is it about you that makes it so no one cares? Is there always something going on in your life or person that makes you feel this way? Be honest.
- Analyze the veracity of that feeling. Assume that you yourself generate this reality in your mind, which leads you to a defensive attitude or behavior.
- Changes. Maybe you need some changes in your life to avoid loneliness or lack of interpersonal relationships. New technologies make it possible to meet people with similar interests to yours. Discover hobbies that you didn't know about before and spend more time on things that make you feel good.
- Analyze those around you. You need to be valued, cared for and worthy of love. If your inner circle doesn't make you feel that way, maybe it's time to make decisions and surround yourself with other people.
- Despite your qualities, too You have to accept your flaws.
- Don't isolate yourself completely (don't stay too long without interacting with others), but at the same time, learn to be aloneYour security cannot depend on the people around you. Approval from others is not necessary.
- Do group activities. This will help you improve your social relationships. Sign up for things you like or that you have put aside: theatre, climbing, painting, cinema, sport…
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- Beware of the self-deceptionYou may be going through a difficult time (at work, as a couple, etc.) and, as you are weaker or more vulnerable, it is common for those thoughts to appear that you do not matter.
- Focus on your self-esteem. It's the most important thing. If you don't love yourself, you won't be able to feel loved.
- Take care of the relationshipsJust as you want to feel loved and cared for, you should pay attention to others. Apply this to all areas of your life: partner, children, family, friends, coworkers, etc.
- Work on family ties. Family is the fundamental pillar on which you must rely. Learn to express your feelings and concerns without fear, without shame. Trust them and go to psychological therapy If you need help to unblock complex situations or improve communication with your loved ones, at you can now try a free session with an online psychologist.
- Don't blame yourself if you don't have a partnerif you don't have a relationship with a family member or you have lost contact with a friend over the years. It's not necessarily your fault.
- Don't compare yourselfYou look at others and see the good relationships they have with everyone, but that's not reality. You analyze them from an external perspective. You don't know if they are happy, or if, at the moment of truth, they count on all those people.
Every person has their problems, their fears, their weaknesses. Don't be ashamed to admit yours. If you can't bear the emotional burden you carry on your back, it's time to ask for help from an online psychologist. 's team of licensed therapists will help you identify and solve those psychological difficulties that leave no room in your mind for any other phrase than «nobody cares about me.»
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- We have been leaders in online psychological care since 2012.
- First informational appointment free.
- Online therapy from 40 euros per session.
- Team of senior psychologists, with decades of experience.
- All the therapy we offer is via videoconference. 100% confidential.
- The same psychologist will attend to you throughout the treatment.
- At you do not lose the money for the sessions. If you cannot connect or are not there, the session is postponed to another day.
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