It is important to have a partner who is on the same page as you on many levels. And as far as sex is concerned, it still carries a more special mention.
Unfortunately, many people have very selfish partners. This is not something you deserve, so it is important to find a remedy or in the most extreme case say goodbye.
Here are some signs that your «other half» only cares about himself. If you experience two or more of these situations, it would be optimal to talk about it to avoid it and make your relationship fuller and more even. Or outright, make the decision to change companies.
1. Hasten the previous caresses. Your partner doesn’t savor the moment, nor does he stop long enough for you to enjoy. On the contrary; he hurries, hoping to satisfy his needs. It seems that he is on a mission to carry it out as quickly as possible. This results in the situation leaving a lot to be desired from your perspective.
2. The preamp basically doesn’t exist. Instead of speeding up this pleasurable lovemaking ritual, maybe he doesn’t even do it. He never gives you oral sex, which can make you feel like there’s something wrong with you. By no means take it like that. If your partner doesn’t take the time to treat you the way you deserve, it’s about him and not you. What you deserve is a long foreplay (if that’s your thing, of course).
3. His priority is not your pleasure. When things get hot between you, he only thinks about his satisfaction. If you ever climax before him, he probably won’t be too amused. To be honest, he’s just very self-centered. Instead of doing what a good partner does (which is make sure you get the attention you need), he focuses only on him. This is unacceptable and unfair.
4. He doesn’t ask you what you like. The open line of communication is closed between you. You may be interested in asking about his needs and likes, but he puts yours aside. Good sex involves constant feedback from both parties, but your partner does not participate in this dynamic. Remember that you deserve someone who is willing to learn every detail from you.
5. He always wants you up. One of the most obvious signs of selfishness in a partner is never offering to be on top. Instead, he always wants you to do all the work. This way, it’s not as much fun (unless it’s something special that you enjoy). Taking turns in positions is a great way to maintain balance when it comes to making love.
6. He manipulates you to have sex. Sometimes you are not in the mood, something totally normal and human (you are not a machine). If this is the case, your partner should respect your decision and not try to guilt you into having sex. If he tells you things like «You never want to have sex,» even if you know it’s not true, you may feel bad about yourself.
7. Not present. His body moves, but his mind seems to be far away or somewhere else. You feel alone, when the exchange of sexual energy should be a sacred moment in your life as a couple.
8. Does not want to be intimate after sex. It’s like her only goal is to have an orgasm and nothing else. He may jump out of bed as soon as intercourse is over and show no affection for you. This can be very painful. It is logical that you want caresses, cuddles and kisses; you want to feel loved
9. Talk about your sex life with friends. He takes the most intimate part of your relationship and exposes it to his friends, even though you obviously prefer that he doesn’t. He just wants to brag about his amazing sex life and doesn’t take into account how that makes you feel, or how his lack of discretion might affect you. Ultimately, such a selfish act means he doesn’t deserve you.