Without a doubt, falling in love is one of the most beautiful things in life. Well they say out there that it is better to have loved and lost than never having done it, because the feeling of being in love is unique.
Although there are loves that come and build, there are also others that seem like hurricanes and destroy everything you have. But it is important that you know that it is a miracle that you have felt love; that little tickle at the beginning, perhaps the fluttering in the stomach or, if it is a much more adult and mature love, the certainty that you found the right person to share your days.
It is said that three types of love are experienced throughout life., which are described below. Which of them have you experienced? Which one are you currently in?
Falling in love for the first time: love that looks good
It has been said many times that you will only really fall in love with three people in your life, which means that there are three types of love. However, it is also believed that you need each of these loves for a different reason.
Often, first love happens when you are young and inexperienced. This kind of love can happen during adolescence.
It is a rebellious, stubborn love and many times it hurts because of the expectations you generate around it.. You remember all those love movies, and you want yours to be similar. One where everything or almost everything is perfect, but most of the time in real life the opposite happens.
Surely you remember having a relationship like this, even one where your parents or the parents of the other person did not agree. But maybe you came to believe that this would be your only love. And although today it may make you laugh, at the time it was necessary to get to know you, to know that part of love and to know what you can feel.
Falling in love a second time: love really hurts
Be supposed to the second is tough love, that love that hurts and that you felt took everything away for a while.
This type of love makes you believe that it is more mature, that now you make different and correct decisions and that, of course, it will last a lifetime. However, it is not like that, because in most cases it hurts, hurts and is unfair.
Second love can become a cycle, one that you often repeat and repeat and repeat, because you think it’s worth it. The relationship can end hundreds of times and you continue to believe that this time it will be different, but it is not. It is the love that wears you down and will make you believe that there will never be another like it..
Sometimes unhealthy, unbalanced, or even narcissistic. There may be emotional, mental or physical abuse or manipulation; there will most likely be high levels of drama. This is exactly what keeps you addicted to that story, because it is the emotional roller coaster of extreme ups and downs.
This love is necessary to experience it to realize what is wrong in a relationship, what you should never allow and should not be overlooked. It will make you mature in an emotional and physical sense as you will face your true self. And putting it aside to grow is essential. In the end, something better will always, always come.
Falling in love for the third time: love that lasts
The third is the love you don’t see coming. The one that generally seems wrong and destroys any lingering ideals of what you assumed true love was..
This is the love that comes so easily that it doesn’t seem possible. It’s the kind of relationship where the connection can’t be explained and it blows your mind because you never planned it. This it’s love where you bond with someone and everything just falls into place: there are no ideal expectations for how each person should act, and no pressure to become someone other than who you already are.
You’re just accepted, and that shakes you to the core. It’s not what you imagined love would be, nor does it play by the rules you expected to play it safe by. But still destroys everything you thought you knew and shows you that love does not have to be as you thought, nor perfect, nor like a movie.
With which you don’t need more, with which you can grow, accept, mature and glimpse; It’s the kind of love that comes to tell you to stop and look at what you have. Of course, it is not about being conformists; it is about valuing what really matters.
It’s going to challenge you, make you cry, and make you feel like you have to work on it. This is the love that knocks on your door as many times as it takes until you answer. It’s love that finally feels right.
While not everyone may experience all three of these loves in their lifetime, it is likely because they are not ready or prepared to do so. Perhaps the reality is that you need to truly learn what love is not before you can understand what it is.
It may take you a lifetime to learn each lesson, or maybe, if you’re lucky, it only takes a few years.
And then there may be those people who fall in love once and discover that that love lasts passionately until their last breath. Those faded, weathered photographs of grandparents who looked just as in love walking hand in hand at 80 as they did in their wedding photo, the ones that leave no doubt that it really was love.
With information from Elephant Journal
Cover photo: Unsplash