In general, emotional intelligence is said to includes at least three skills: emotional awareness or the ability to identify and name their own emotions; the capacity of harness those emotions and apply them to tasks how to think and solve problems; and the ability to manage emotionswhich includes both regulate one’s emotions when necessary as help others to do the same.
There is no proof or validated psychometric scale for emotional intelligence as there is for «g», the general intelligence factor, and many argue that emotional intelligence is therefore not a real construct, but rather a way of describing interpersonal skills that go by other names.
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Despite this criticism, the concept of emotional intelligence, sometimes referred to as emotional quotient or EQhas gained wide acceptance. In recent years, Some employers have even built emotional intelligence tests into their application and interview processes.under the theory that someone with a high emotional intelligence I would make a better leader or co-worker.
Although some studies have found a link between emotional intelligence and job performancemany others have shown no correlation, and the lack of a scientifically valid scale makes it hard to really measure or predict someone’s emotional intelligence at work or at home.
What does it mean to be emotionally intelligent?
According to Psychology Today a emotionally intelligent individual is well aware of their own emotional stateseven negativity (frustration, sadness or something more subtle) and is able to identify and manage them. These people are especially attuned to the emotions that others experience. Understandably, sensitivity to emotional cues, both within oneself and from one’s social environment, can make you a better friend, parent, leader, or romantic partner. Fortunately, these skills can be honed.
1. self awareness. The ability to recognize an emotion as «it happens» is the key to your EQ. develop the self awareness it requires tuning in to your true feelings. If you assess your emotions, you can manage them. The main elements of self-awareness are:
emotional awareness: Your ability to recognize your own emotions and their effects.
Self-confidence. Security about your self-esteem and abilities.
2. Self-regulation. You often have little control over when you experience emotions. However, you can have a say in how long an emotion will last by using a number of techniques to relieve negative emotions like anger, anxiety, or depression. Some of these techniques include reframing a situation in a more positive light, taking a long walk and meditating or praying.
Self-regulation involves:
- self control. Management of disruptive impulses.
- Integrity. Maintain standards of honesty and integrity.
- Conscientiousness. Take responsibility for your own performance.
- Adaptability. Managing change with flexibility.
- Innovation. Be open to new ideas.
3. Motivation. To motivate yourself for any achievement requires clear goals and a positive attitude. Although you may have a predisposition to a positive or negative attitude, with effort and practice you can learn to think more positively. If you catch negative thoughts as they occur, you can reframe them in more positive terms, which will help you achieve your goals. Motivation is made up of:
- drive to achievement. Your constant effort to improve or achieve a standard of excellence.
- Commitment. Align with the goals of the group or organization.
- Initiative. Prepare to act on opportunities.
- Optimism. Pursuing goals persistently despite obstacles and setbacks.
4. Empathy. The ability to recognize how people feel is important to success in your life and career. The more skilled you are at discerning the feelings behind the signals of others, the better you will be able to control the signals you send out. An empathic person excels at:
guidance service. Anticipate, recognize and meet customer needs.
developing others. Sensing what others need to progress and reinforcing their abilities.
Leveraging diversity. Cultivating opportunities through diverse people.
political awareness. Read the emotional currents and power relations of a group.
understand others. Discern the feelings behind the needs and desires of others.
5. Social skills. Developing good interpersonal skills is equivalent to success in your life and career. In today’s always-on world, everyone has immediate access to technical knowledge. Therefore, the «people skills» are even more important now because you must possess a high EQ to better understand, empathize and negotiate with others in a global economy. Among the most useful skills are:
- Influence. Managing effective persuasion tactics.
- Communication. Sending clear messages.
- Leadership. Inspiring and guiding groups and individuals.
- Change catalyst. Initiating or managing the change.
- Conflict management. Understand, negotiate and resolve disagreements.
- Building ties. Cultivate instrumental relationships.
- Collaboration and cooperation. Working with others towards shared goals.
- Team capabilities. Create group synergy in the search for collective objectives.
What factors are at play when high IQ people fail and low IQ people succeed?
How well you do in your life and career is determined by both of you. IQ alone is not enough; EQ matters too. In fact, psychologists generally agree that among the ingredients for success, IQ accounts for about 10% (at best 25%); the rest depends on everything else, including EQ.
A study of Harvard graduates in business, law, medicine, and teaching showed a negative or null correlation between an indicator of IQ (entrance exam scores) and subsequent professional success.